...at the drive in

we had a lot fun at the drive in!! it was great. just great. so i got a radio, that wouldnt work btw. and my truck wouldnt pick up the station but other trucks around us had the station just fine. it was a great nite and one of the best ive had in a while. it was a great mix of people! my friend noelle came up from gardnerville (we go way back and have a pirate history...long story) and she brought her friend tink. also, petey, jamison, matty, kari, amanda and her brother (whos name escapes me now...i prolly couldnt spell it anyhow). my friend timmie and his girl friend tamara also came along! it was fabulous. i'm gonna plan another one, and maybe plan it a little in advance so we may be able to get a bigger group (we will see if i can try to break out of my shell of randomness....and plan something a little while in advance) and popcorn is a must next time! lol.

God blesses me more than i deserve. we were talking about destiny last nite, its one of the things i struggle with. i dont like structure. i like chaos, randomness. i love it so for me to think that God has a purpose for my life and has it planned out scares me and i just plain dont like it. i realized last nite though that im just thankful that he is unique to everyones lives and he blesses me with the idea of randomness even though he knows my destiny day by day for the rest of my life.

Thanks to all those who came out. You are a blessing in my life.

In Christ

its refreshing. so im reading through the monday morning church book. i love it. today, i was reminded that there is nothing i can do to deserve God's grace. thats comforting.

over the last few weeks my patience is being tested by many people. i am very patient and hardly get mad. it takes quiet a bit. (please dont try --- lol) but i have found myself overly frustrated lately. mainly because of peoples words and actions. there have been personalities of people close to me that i hate. i hate when people use others as a crutch when it is meaningless and they can do it by themselves. they do it for the attention of others. secondly people attacking the one person i love the most here on earth. my father. for all those that dont know, i am a daddy's girl and think VERY highly of him! ahhh. ok back to my point. heres a little bit of the set up. a guy here at work said something incorrect about my father. it was just mean and completely untrue. not his place to say. so while reading the book i was reminded, we are placed where jesus would be placed. im sure Jesus's father was comdemed by people. im sure he had to be confronted with negative ideas of his heavenly father. and i can imagine how mad he could have been. but he loved them just the same. i hope that i can keep my love towards people. it is slipping.

I love you Jesus and i pray everyday that you will make me stronger and more like you.

a little ruffled

so tonite something was said to me that made me a little upset. my dad is my everything. i love him more than anyone on this earth and something was said about him. and the thing that was said (looking back on it now) was not meant to be mean, but that is how i took it. not mean, just disrespectful. lately this friend of mine has been really sarcastic, which is fine! so am i, but there gets to a point where you dont hear anything encouraging, and you can only brush off soo much. so i guess this was the straw, and i just lost it, i was heart broken and really hurt.

on another note, im not good with sharing hard feelings. so if this blog doesnt make much sense its ok. i grew up like "one of the boys" and we dont share our sad feelings right?? lol. much easier for me to write a little about them though. so along with this idea, i may have been a little harsh. --- i dont know if this is just me, but i dont care to hear that someone is sorry. i can see if the person is sorry or not by their eyes. i just want to be assured that it will not happen again --- so i told him how it felt, and how much i was really angered by this. (it takes a ton to get me angry). he appaulogized like a nice person, but i just told him i didnt want the appology i just wanted him to be aware of how i felt and for it not to happen again. (maybe a little mean on my part...)

i feel better that i got it out. ok back to work. and eventually sleep.